The Pez Dispenser and The Reign Of Terror
by HobbesLuigi82
Summary: When Calvin's new invention is taken over by a mysterious entity, Calvin and Hobbes must fight for the planet! My first fic, so go easy! Also my first Calvin and Hobbes Movie! COMPLETE! READ AND REVIEW!
1. The Origins Of The Pez 6000

Calvin and Hobbes THE MOVIE

The Pez Dispenser and The Reign Of Terror

Chapter 1

The Origins Of The Pez 6000

It was a normal day as ever in the Calvin household.

Well, as normal as you could call it, I suppose.

Hobbes was perfectly happy to just lounge on the bed, reading the latest issue of _Captain Napalm_, totally unaware that within five seconds, his greatest nightmare, which he hoped never to live through again, would come alive.

The bedroom door swung open, and Calvin strolled into the room. He then said the words that struck terror into Hobbes' heart the split second he said them.

"Hey, Hobbes, want to see my new invention?"

With amazing reflexes and unique tiger agility, Hobbes tried to jump out of the window as fast as he could, but Calvin caught him by the tail.

"Geez, TRUST me for once, will ya!" said Calvin, dragging Hobbes back into the room. "What do you think it will do; KILL you?" Calvin continued, annoyed.

"I totally and completely refuse to be a guinea-pig for any of your death-traps that you loosely term 'inventions'." snapped Hobbes, crossing his arms and shooting a sharp look at Calvin.

"Honestly Hobbes," Calvin sighed, shaking his head. "I swear I will never understand you. You and I both know that my inventions are for our benefit and well-being!"

Hobbes rolled his eyes, as unpleasant memories of the Time Machine and Transmogrifier flooded into his mind.

"Especially _this_ one," Calvin continued, suddenly turning around and holding a candy dispenser. Meet the _Pez 6000 – **P**lastic **E**mpowered **Z**apper_!"

Hobbes flinched repeatedly as Calvin held the Pez dispenser before him.

"Getthatthingoutofmyfacegetthatthingoutofmyfacegetthatthingoutofmyface," Hobbes said as fast as possible, stepping backwards.

"I'll repeat again," Calvin said sternly. "This device is for our benefit and well-being!"

"What's that?" asked Hobbes, still stepping backwards. "Kills you in only half the time of the MTM?

Calvin lost his patience, finally.

"FOR GOODNESS' SAKE, GET A GRIP! I haven't even told you what it does yet! It's a weapon—"

Calvin was cut off by Hobbes diving under the bed. Calvin ignored him, and continued.

"It's a formidable weapon capable of matching that of the Hiroshima Bomb if used correctly. It doesn't require nuclear power, it doesn't require batteries, and – best of all in my opinion – its ammunition is Pez candy. You can also alter the power of the shot. There's a small dial on the side, which goes from 'Peashooter' to 'Hiroshima Bomb'. Allow me to demonstrate."

Hobbes peeked out from under the bed, and saw Calvin open the window. Calvin switched the dial on the Pez 6000 to 'PP7 Pistol', and shot a can (which he set up earlier) off the top of the fence.

"See?" Calvin said, kneeling down and peeking under the bed. "Not SO bad, is it? But you haven't seen anything yet!"

Hobbes retreated further under the bed, while Calvin set power dial to 'rapid-fire machine gun', and proceeded to reduce Susie's toys (which she had left outside while she went in for lunch) to tiny pieces of plastic and rubber.

Calvin rolled on the floor laughing as hard as he could. "Ha ha! Just THINK how this is going to play a vital role in our G.R.O.S.S meetings!"

Hobbes slowly dragged himself out fro under the bed. "I _guuuuueeeees soooooooooo_," he said warily. "Just one thing – we don't have any enemies! What are we going to use it for?"

20 minutes later…

"Ooooohhh boy," Hobbes sighed. Calvin and Hobbes were in the drugstore, and Calvin was trying to threaten the cashier with the Pez 6000 while Hobbes was trying to steal twenty issues of _Captain Maim_.

Or, by the cashier's perspective, a six-year-old with a stuffed tiger was holding a candy dispenser in front of his face. The cashier picked up a phone.

"Security, could you please come down here?"

Another 20 minutes later, Calvin was sent back home by the police, and Calvin was sent to bed without any dinner. Of course, Hobbes had to put up with Calvin's moaning for a while, but eventually they dropped off to sleep.

Totally unaware of the life-threatening danger they would face tomorrow.


	2. Well, Did You EXPECT It To GO OK?

Chapter 2

Well, Did You EXPECT It To Go OK?

Calvin awoke the next morning…at 4:30 AM. He simply couldn't wait to test the Pez 6000 out on something. So he climbed out of bed, and headed for the attic. He was going to make some modifications to the device, for added safety.

Three quarters of an hours' worth of screwdriving, welding, and fixing later…

"_Phew_," Calvin puffed. "It's complete! This 'pilot' button will help a lot! I'll test it in the morning." Calvin put the Pez 6000 in an old box of photos albums in the corner, and went back to his room for sleep.

Morning came surprisingly quickly. Then again, it always does on a school morning, doesn't it?

Calvin nudged Hobbes repeatedly. "C'mon, Hobbes, wake up! I've made improvements on the Pez 6000!"

Hobbes pulled the covers further over his head, and mumbled, " CD players swimming in an ocean of gravy…Zzzzzz…with tree trunks…snort Zzzzz,"

Calvin scowled, got out of bed, and got dressed. He went up to the attic, and got the Pez 6000 from the box. He then went outside to test out 'pilot' mode.

Calvin placed the Pez 6000 on the ground and set it to 'peashooter' mode. Then Calvin stepped back about eight feet away. Suddenly, as if by magic, the device whizzed through the air, doing loop-the-loops and graceful downward spirals, firing small pieces of candy all the while.

"**_WHOOPEE!_**" Calvin screamed. "IT WORKS! IT WORKS!"

Meanwhile, back in the house, Hobbes heard the noise, and woke up. He ran to the window, and when he saw an unmanned flying candy dispenser firing candy ammo, he nearly fainted. Hobbes rushed outside to talk to Calvin.

"Calvin! How's it…doing that! How's it…FLYING?"

Calvin turned his head around, and said, grinning, "You know how I said I made some modifications to the Pez 6000?"

"Yeeeeeessss," Hobbes replied, motioning Calvin to say more.

"Well, I duplicated the microchip that is inside the Transmogrifier Gun that reads brainwaves, and I put it in the Pez 6000! I'm currently sending brainwaves telling it to fly. So if we're ever stuck anywhere, and we need it, we can just call it to us! Clever, huh?"

"Still a potential death-trap," Hobbes replied quickly, not taking his eyes off the candy dispenser.

Calvin slapped a hand to his forehead. "What more do you want me to do, fit it with an airbag!"

The Pez 6000 started flying erratically. In stead of doing well-timed loop-the-loops, it was now zig-zagging like a drunken bee.

"Why's it doing that?" asked Hobbes, pointing at the Pez 6000, now struggling somewhat.

"It's probably because you're annoying me and scrambling up my brainwaves!" Calvin replied in an annoyed tone.

Hobbes ability to take advantage of whatever Calvin says just kicked in.

"You're brainwaves are ALWAYS scrambled!" Hobbes laughed.

The retort portion of Calvin's brain also kicked in. "HA! You just insulted yourself! Humans are smarter than tigers!" Calvin grabbed Hobbes' leg, trying to trip him over.

"Compared to you, I'm Einstein! Leggo my leg!" Hobbes shouted. The wreck was on.

The duo spent a good five minutes fighting. They rolled, punched, kicked, clawed (Hobbes exclusive), and generally fought.

Calvin was covered in dirt. "That…_puff_…does it! I'm gonna knock…_pant_…you into next week!"

Hobbes wasn't much better, either. He, too, was covered in mud, but at least he noticed something rather important.

"Uh, Calvin? Did you telepathically tell the Pez 6000 to set to 'rapid-fire machine gun' mode?"

"No," replied Calvin. Calvin turned around to see the Pez 6000 hovering one inch in front of his face. Indeed, it was on 'rapid-fire machine gun' mode.

"Even if it shoots you, it can't hurt." Said Hobbes. "It's only candy."

"Uhhhh…the firing mechanism is so powerful that it's at least twice as strong as a real bullet." Calvin replied, not taking his eyes of the candy dispenser.

Calvin tried to use all the strength of his brainwaves to push away the Pez 6000, but it wouldn't budge.

It took Calvin and Hobbes a few seconds to put two and two together.

"**_RUN!_**" Calvin screamed. The duo retreated into the house as fast as possible. The Pez 6000 closely followed, firing three clips' worth of ammo. Thankfully for our heroes, not one bullet shot them.

Once inside the house, Calvin and Hobbes propped up a coat hanger and a chair against the door. The Pez 6000 was giving up despite that barrier, though, as it was now firing bullets to make a hole in the door to get through.

"That's it!" shouted Hobbes. The duo were in the hallway leading to the front door. ""It's only for our benefit and well-being!" YOU said! That's the last time I'll trust you as long as I live!"

"Forget that!" screamed Calvin. "There's a deranged killer out there! We need a plan…and _FAST_."


	3. Claustrophobia, Chaos, and Candy!

_**Sorry it took this long to get Chapter 3 up. I've been busy with schoolwork lately. Anyway, enjoy this chapter! And congratulations to Swing123 and garfieldodie fortheir amazing work on Calvin and Hobbes The Series: Season One! I look forward to Season Two!**_

_**NOTE:Due to the amount of homework I'm swamped with every week, there could be a lot of waiting in between chapters. I'm really sorry about this, but I promise to have Chapter 4 up soon!

* * *

**_

_**Chapter 3**_

**_Claustrophobia, Chaos, and Candy!_**

Calvin and Hobbes were still wedged against the door, thinking as fast as they could to make a plan that would stop the deranged flying candy dispenser.

Calvin was stuttering. "But…but…I can't figure it out! I programmed that chip chip to read my thoughts and my thoughts only! How's it being controlled?"

"Maybe that poor guy in your MTM finally snapped," replied Hobbes.

"You're NOT helping!" shouted Calvin. "Besides, HE'S on a different microchip completely."

"_What a shame,_" said the MTM, sitting in Calvin's back pocket.

"Hey!" Calvin piped up. "That's a great idea! I can frazzle the Pez 6000 with the MTM's laser! Thanks, Hobbes! You DID help!"

"I'll get some paper and carbons for your written apology," said Hobbes, walking off to Dad's home office.

Calvin swung open the front door, MTM in hand, and shouted, "EAT LASER, YOU FLOATING PIECE OF PLASTIC JUNK!"

As soon as Calvin finished the word "junk", the MTM said, "_The batteries are dead, dunce_."

Time stood still for a moment, as Calvin looked straight at the Pez 6000, and the Pez 6000 looked Calvin dead in the eye.

Then Hobbes quickly grabbed Calvin by the back of his collar, yanked him inside the house and locked and propped the door.

Calvin was in hysterics. "NEW IDEA! NEED A NEW IDEA! ONE THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE GOING OUTSIDE!"

Just then, Calvin and Hobbes heard Mom screaming.

"CALVIN! ARE YOU STILL HERE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON THE SCHOOL BUS! GET ON THE BUS, QUICK!"

"WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO, _KILL ME_? My Pez 6000 is out of control! It's after me! It's lethal! Don't put me out! DON'T PUT ME OUUUUUUUT!" Calvin screamed.

Mom threw him outside. As soon as Mom left to get her car keys, the Pez 6000 sprang to life, and locked on it's aim at Calvin's head.

Calvin raised his arms in surrender.

In response, the Pez 6000's power dial switched to 'Hiroshima Bomb', and started storing energy to fire.

3…

2…

1…

Click.

Click.

Click.

The Pez 6000 just hovered there, going 'click'. It had run out of candy ammunition.

Calvin didn't waste any time. He jumped into the air, grabbed the Pez 6000, and wrestled it to the ground. Although the device tried to fly away, Calvin caught it again, and snapped the candy dispenser in two.

Then, just to make certain, Calvin snapped the device in four.

Then, just to make ultra-certain, Calvin melted the Pez 6000 with the Transmogrifier Gun's laser.

Hobbes ran outside to Calvin. The duo looked at the molten piece of yellow plastic that was smoking on the ground. Then Calvin and Hobbes looked at each other for a few seconds. Then they burst into song.

"**_IT'S OVER! IT'S OVER! THE NIGHTMARE IS OVER! WE'RE SAFE! WE'RE SAFE! WE WON! WE WON! YAAAAAAAAHHHHHOOOOOOO!_**"

But Mom heard the noise, and gave Calvin a massive lecture on how he shouldn't have missed the school bus. Mom also had to drive him to school. But Calvin really didn't care. It had been another adventure for him and Hobbes, and another enemy they had trounced. Calvin took Hobbes to school with him, too (with the excuse he was taking him for show-and-tell).

One long, hard, tiring, and overall boring day at school later…

Calvin jumped off the school bus with Hobbes. They were just idly chatting about how tough school is what lessons Calvin had had today.

"Funny," Hobbes said. "I could've _sworn_ that 7 + 3 was 73. I think that those problems are way too advanced for first grade, if you ask me."

"Forget about it, that's history!" Calvin laughed.

"No, it's math," said Hobbes.

"Huh?" asked Calvin.

"Never mind," replied Hobbes.

The pair walked across the front lawn, until they came to the crumpled remains of the Pez 6000.

"What are we going to do with what's left of the Pez 6000?" asked Hobbes.

"Easy," answered Calvin. "Wait here a moment."

Calvin ran off.

While he was gone, Hobbes sat down on the ground next to the broken candy dispenser. Suddenly, he found himself talking to it.

"I'm glad Calvin broke you when he did. Now we won't have to go on some life-risking journey. Well, I suppose it already has been, but you know what I mean…"

Calvin came back with the shovel. He dug a big hole, threw in the Pez 6000, buried it, and to make sure nobody got their hands on it, he heaved a heavy rock on top of it. With evil device forever destroyed, Calvin and Hobbes went inside to watch TV to celebrate.

Later that night, Calvin and Hobbes had the best night's sleep they had in ages.

But, unbeknownst to them, their adventure had only just begun. And they had better enjoy the sleep they got now…

…lest it be the last sleep they ever got.

Calvin and Hobbes woke up the next morning at 5:15 AM. Calvin bounced on the bed and shouted, "**OH BOY, IT'S SATURDAY!**" Calvin and Hobbes raced downstairs and turned on the living room TV faster than you can say, "Why isn't there a picture on the TV screen?"…

…Which Calvin did say.

Hobbes flicked through the TV guide until it got to the 'Saturday' page. "It says here that the cartoons don't start until 6:00 AM."

"Heck, that's 45 minutes from now! C'mon, I'll race you up and down the stairs!"

Calvin's mom, who could hear the banging and crashing of the stairs, wondered aloud, "Why can't he ever be like this on school days?"

Dad, desperate to get any sleep at all, asked, "Go break his little legs, would you, honey?"

CRASH! BANG! BONK!

Dad pulled the pillow over his head.

Calvin and Hobbes spent the next few hours eating Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs (Well, just Calvin, actually. Hobbes refuses to eat cereal that turns the milk purple.), watching cartoons on TV, and generally having great fun.

Judging by the way Calvin and Hobbes were behaving, you'd think yesterday's events were totally forgotten. Or even never happened.

They were about to get an unpleasant reminder.

The duo were in the G.R.O.S.S. treehouse, attending a meeting.

Dictator-For-Life Calvin kicked things off.

"This G.R.O.S.S. meeting will now come to order! Herewith, a field report from Top Scout Calvin!" Calvin saluted Hobbes. Hobbes saluted back.

"What news, Scout?" asked First Tiger and President Hobbes.

"The enemy has been sighted walking down the sidewalk two blocks away, Mr. President," Calvin reported. He leaned over the treehouse and pointed at Susie Derkins, G.R.O.S.S's archenemy.

"Do we have any intel on who the enemy is, Scout?" inquired Hobbes.

Calvin got out a pair of binoculars Dad once gave him. He zoomed in on the enemy.

"Yes!" announced Calvin. "Susie Derkins, an acknowledged **_girl_**! I recommend we establish a strike force!"

"It's objecti—Hey! What's that weird rumbling, Scout? Is this part of the secret plan?"

"N-N-No!" replied Calvin. He was bouncing up and down from the shaking.

Indeed, the ground was violently shaking, growing more intense as every second passed. Suddenly, without any warning, the bottom and the left half of the treehouse exploded in a shower of fireworks, throwing Calvin and Hobbes out of the treehouse screaming.

Calvin and Hobbes looked at the remains of the treehouse. Half of it had been burnt, and many of the branches were broken. The treehouse was obviously unfit for one person to stand in, let alone a kid and a tiger.

The smoke cleared, revealing the Pez 6000 lying on the ground. Calvin wasn't surprised. The explosion had broken the rock that was on top of the device.

But upon closer inspection, the Pez 6000 was no longer burnt and broken. It was gleamy and new, and now—HUH!--- made of METAL?

Then something devastating happened. The Pez 6000 lifted itself off the ground. And it now said 'Pez 6,000,000 ' on the side. The horror of the device had returned. And should it ever be destroyed again…

…it looked as though it was going to take Calvin and Hobbes with it.

"Oh…no…" Calvin breathed. "It's…here…back…" Calvin voice became a whisper. He was frozen in shock.

Not so Hobbes, though. Hobbes had pure rage in his eyes. One of the branches that was destroyed was his favorite place to nap, and he wasn't about to let this candy dispenser get away with it.

Hobbes claws shot out at an incredible speed. "**_YYAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!_**" Hobbes ran towards the Pez 6000 and slashed at it with his claws. It didn't leave a mark.

Hobbes looked closely at the Pez 6000. It had undergone more than purely cosmetic surgery. It now had three firing turrets, one for candy bullets, one for firing fire, and one that fired ice. But the most worrying new aspect of this revamped contraption was that the new lowest setting on the power dial was 'rapid fire machine-gun' and the new highest setting was…gulp…'Halley's Comet'.

Hobbes eyes widened. He turned around and shouted, "CALVIN! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! SAVE YOURSELF WHILE YOU STILL CAN!" Then it happened. The Pez 6000 shot Hobbes with the ice beam, and he was now frozen to the spot.

Calvin was horrified what this…_evil_…_thing_…had just done to his best friend. But Calvin didn't cry. Calvin didn't give up. He didn't let Hobbes' sacrifice be in vain. Instead, Calvin did what most grown-ups wouldn't do in this situation. He shouted, "**_GOTTA CATCH ME FIRST, YOU RUSTY PIECE OF SCRAP METAL!_**" Now _that's_ guts. Now _that's_ courage. Now **_THAT'S_** friendship.

Calvin turned around and ran for the house. The Pez 6,000,000 closely followed. Calvin dashed up to his room, grabbed his Hypercube containing all of his inventions, and jumped out of the window, with the demented sweetie dispenser following him.

Calvin had a route mapped out in his mind. He ran past the garage, taking his wagon with him, and leaped into it. He was headed en route for Sneer Hill.

"Faster, Hobbes! Faster!" shouted Calvin…then he turned around. He realised that Hobbes wasn't with him anymore. A tear rolled down his cheek. But that didn't make him any less determined to stop this piece of trash! He wiped the tear off, and got ready for anything that the Pez 6,000,000 had to throw at him!

As Calvin rocketed around a corner, he looked over his shoulder. As he suspected, the device was gaining fast. Then, it suddenly opened fire.

**RATTATATTATATATATTATTA**

Calvin missed every shot, but the wagon had suffered a bit. The screw had come out of the back right wheel, and was now slowly coming off. But Calvin had a plan.

He purposely drove right off the edge of the cliff that was at the bottom of Sneer Hill, but he grabbed a branch on the way down. He let go of the branch, and it sprang him into the air, at the same level of the Pez 6,000,000. Calvin didn't waste a second. He grabbed the device's candy ammo, rendering it helpless.

As Calvin fell back down, he shouted, "GOOD LUCK TRYING TO DO ANYTHING WITHOUT YOUR AMMUNITION!"

Calvin's mind was snapped back to reality. He was falling fast. He quickly grabbed his Transmogrifier Gun out from his pocket, and transmogrified into a light particle. He zipped all the way to the back yard instantaneously.

Calvin found the frozen Hobbes. Calvin dragged him inside the house, and thawed him out in front of the fire. Hobbes was slowly coming around. Calvin eyes lit up. Was he still alive?

"Uuughh…EW! Water! My fur will stink now!"

"**_HOBBES!_**" Calvin cried with joy.

"Ohhh…Thanks, Calvin. I think I woulda died of frostbite if I had been left much longer…" Hobbes sighed.

Calvin was overjoyed to see his best friend in all the world back. He gave Hobbes a massive hug, and, despite being just as wet as Hobbes after the hug, Calvin promptly made Hobbes some peanut butter crackers, a hot chocolate (with marshallows in), and a comic book to read (Issue 381 of _Amazon Woman_ if you were wondering).

After their happy reunion (and a not-so-happy reunion when Calvin discovered that Hobbes had drawn mustaches and glasses on all the characters), Calvin and Hobbes began to map out a plan on a big piece of paper. This was going to be a plan to decide what to do now that the Pez 6000 was back.

"I've got some news," said Hobbes.

And it was the best news yet.


	4. System Upgrade

_**Sorry this update took so long, guys. I took a short break to recover from my schoolwork, and I'll try to keep updatesup often. So, please, enjoy this for the time being!**_

__

_**Chapter 4**_

_**The Good, The Bad, And The Duplicate**_

Calvin brought Hobbes up to speed on everything that had happened so far.

"So," Calvin concluded, "Without it's ammo clip, it's obsolete. We're safe…for the time being. We need a plan before the Pez 6,000,000 gets an ammo refill. Any ideas?" Calvin started chewing on the end of his pencil.

"Well, I know two things: One: It doesn't need ammo to be deadly."

Calvin couldn't believe his ears. "WHAT?" He shouted in disbelief. "How?"

Hobbes went into more detail.

"Before I was frozen, I noticed two extra turrets on the Pez 6,000,000. One fired ice, the other fired flames. Those don't need ammo. But the worst part is that whoever's controlling it has fiddled with the power settings. The lowest setting now is 'rapid-fire machine gun and the highest…" Hobbes voice became a whisper. "…is 'Halley's Comet."

Calvin would've fainted if Hobbes hadn't quickly said, "But there is a bit of good news. I think I found a weak point."

Calvin listened carefully.

"There was also a microphone attached to the Pez 6,000,000, and it said, "Once you're done with the kid, report back to the back yard base. We'll take things from there." The person on the microphone also mentioned something about "Transmogrifier", but I got frozen before I could hear what he said.

Calvin's nimble mind realised what the other side's plan was.

"Transmogrifier!" Calvin almost shouted. "They must be after the Transmogrifier to use it for their evil plans! It's so simple now! They took the Pez 6,000, modified it, and are now using it to do their dirty work and put us out of the picture! C'mon, there isn't a second to lose!" Calvin darted up the stairs, but was stopped halfway by Hobbes.

"Don't you think we would be better off going to the back yard, finding their base, and stopping them before they have a chance to grab the Transmogrifier?" Hobbes suggested.

Calvin thought about this. Then he said, "Good call. Go to the garage and get a shovel. I'll get the Hypercube."

"Roger," Hobbes replied, and he ran out the front door.

Calvin ran upstairs and grabbed the Hypercube. But before he went outside to join Hobbes, he checked in the closet. Good. The Transmogrifier box was still there. Calvin jumped out of his bedroom window and met up with Hobbes.

Hobbes, who had seen him leap out the window, asked, "What was the point of that?"

"Two reasons," answered Calvin. "One, it's quicker to get to the backyard. Two, it adds drama and action, two vital things that movies like this need, so that cinema-goers are pleased."

Hobbes rolled his eyes. He handed Calvin a shovel. "Now let's go. We don't know how much time we have."

"Right behind ya, buddy," Calvin replied. They both started digging.

An hour an a half, and a lunch break later…

Calvin and Hobbes were exhausted. Calvin breathed, "I don't think I can dig much longer,"

"Same…here," Hobbes panted. He plunged his shovel into the ground, and suddenly, the entire hole they dug in the lawn collapsed!

Calvin and Hobbes were now underneath the back lawn, and they were half-buried in dirt and dry mud. They clambered out of it.

Hobbes took a look at their surroundings. They were in what looked like some kind of laboratory. There was kid at a desk, holding a screwdriver. But he had his back to Calvin and Hobbes, and they couldn't see his face.

"Excuse me," Calvin called. "we were wondering if you—"

The kid turned around to face Calvin and Hobbes

" …knew anything about…" Calvin's voice trailed off.

Hobbes was frozen in shock.

The kid had black trousers, a red and black striped T-shirt, tiny little red and white sneakers, black eyes, and _very_ neatly combed blond hair.

"**_YOU!_**" Calvin and Hobbes shouted in unison.

The kid was the physical manifestation of Calvin's good side, created when Calvin added an Ethicator to his Duplicator. The Ethicator would give you the choice of making your duplicate good or evil. Calvin made his duplicate good so that it would tidy his room, do his homework, got to school, etc. But they had a fight over whether it was right to like Susie Derkins or not, and they got in a fight. But the duplicate had an evil thought of hurting Calvin. Because the duplicate was bound to be good and nothing but good, the Ethicator in the Duplicator destroyed him because he had an evil thought.

Calvin couldn't understand. "**_How are you here?_**" Calvin demanded. "The spectral release phantasmatron in the Ethicator destroyed you!"

Hobbes coughed, and said, "Translation: You're supposed to be dead!" Calvin nudged Hobbes.

"Oy."

"It DID destroy me!" The duplicate bellowed. "You remember that evil thought I had? That destroyed me! YOU bound me to be your personal slave! You bound me to do your homework! YOU **_DESTOYED ME, AND EVERYTHING I HAD!_**"

"But…how are you here?" Calvin breathed.

"Use your memory, Calvin." The duplicate said. "What do you _always_ have in your pocket?"

Calvin rummaged through his left pocket. He pulled out his Transmogrifier Gun.

"It was easy to transmogrify myself back to normal;" The duplicate said.

"All I had to do was think. Since that day, all I've been thinking of, day and night, is a plan to make you pay; in the most gruelling, horrible, painful way possible. I had it – The PEZ 6000. But it was too weak to serve my purpose. Sure, I did make an attempt on your life with it, but it didn't have enough ammo. I took the remains and modified it into a weapon so powerful, I could wipe every sign of life off this crummy planet. I'm seriously considering that."

"But only I can control the PEZ 6000! How did you—"

The duplicate cut him off by laughing in the most sickeningly annoying way. "It's quite simple if you think about it! Then again, you fail every single quiz you get; so I'm not all that surprised! I AM YOU! I'm only your GOOD side; who got an evil thought; liked that evil thought; and acts on that evil thought. I can control because I'm smarter; I actually paid attention in class!"

The PEZ 6,000,000 flew up to the duplicate.

The duplicate pointed a finger at Calvin and Hobbes, and said, "Kill them. Whatever the cost."

"**_RUN!_**" Calvin shouted. Calvin and Hobbes darted out of the hole, with the sweet dispenser and dupe following close behind.

"We need a quick plan!" Calvin shouted as he and Hobbes dodged wave after wave of AR33 Assault Rifle fire.

"Get out one of your inventions!" shouted Hobbes, never thinking he would say those dreaded words.

Calvin didn't have any time to see what device he was getting, and looked at what he had gotten.

The Time Pauser.

_Yes!_

A split second later and a line of bullets was headed straight for Evil Calvin.

"Psych!" the duplicate shouted, and turned the bullets into foam pellets with his Transmogrifier Gun.

Calvin got an idea. "C'mon!" he told Hobbes. They headed for the road. But just as Calvin crossed the road—

_**TOOT! TOOT!TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!**_

_**WHAM!**_

Calvin had been hit by a car.

The duplicate ran over and did a merry dance.

"I did it! I did it! I'm smarter than Calvin! I beat him! He's gone!" He sung.

But on the other side of the road, behind a massive mansion, there was a small six-year-old kid with spiky yellow hair, purple and white sneakers, a red and black striped shirt, and black trousers. He had a stuffed toy tiger with him.


	5. Panic Room

_Chapter 6_

_The Two Tigers and the Territorial Toy Army_

"This is a pretty big place," Calvin commented as he made his way to the front of the house.

Well, it wasn't a house, it was a mansion, really.

"Let's go in quick!" said Hobbes. "Socrates should be home. We're going to need his help."

"Ooooohhhh no," said Calvin, with his arms outstretched and taking a step back. "We've already got a deranged killer kid on our butts, we don't need Dr. Prankster to keep us company."

"Who'd you rather trust; one of my friends who pranks people or a six-year-old with a Pez dispenser capable of destroying the planet and not afraid to use it?" Hobbes said, irritatedly.

"OK, OK…sheesh…" Calvin grumbled, as Hobbes rang the doorbell. Luckily for them, Socrates answered it. "Come in, Hobbes, welcome!" said Socrates cheerfully. "Sorry," said Hobbes, "I had to bring Mr. Eggnog Brain with me."

Hobbes walked inside the hallway fine, but as soon as Calvin put his foot on the inside doormat—

_**SHHHNAP!**_

"_AAAAAAUUUUGGGGGHHHH!_" Calvin had stepped into a rope trap, had been sent flying through the house and an unclockable speed, and landed in the Olympic-sized swimming pool in the back yard.

The two tigers were laughing their heads off as Calvin surfaced from the water. He shouted, "I _TOLD_ YOU WE HAD ENOUGH TROUBLE!"

10 minutes passed…

"…and that's all that's happened so far," Calvin finished. He had just explained to Socrates what had been going on with the duplicate and The PEZ 6,000,000.

"Now THAT'S a device I could use for pranking," Socrates said.

"This is really serious, Socrates," Hobbes said. "Even if the dupe _does_ kill Calvin and me, he's still going to destroy the world."

Socrates looked indifferent.

"In other words," Hobbes added, "He'll kill you too."

"YIKES!" screamed Socrates. "We gotta do something!"

"That's why we've come to you," Calvin said, narrowing his eyes.

"Okay, I've got a plan. Stay here, and leave it to me." said Socrates, getting up.

"What's your plan?" asked Calvin.

"Sorry," said Socrates, winking craftily. "I like to keep my pranks secret."

5 minutes later, Socrates ran in plain view of the duplicate.

"Hey! Get back here, Hobbes!" shouted the dupe, chasing after him.

After 20 seconds of chasing, Evil Calvin fell into Socrates' trap.

The dupe got his foot caught in long length of string, which dragged him to a trampoline, which propelled him into the air, which caught him in a tree, where he walked into a rope trap, was sent flying into town, landed on another trampoline, and was sent bouncing into the river, where the current was washing him further and further away from Calvin and Hobbes. By now he could be in another state.

Socrates returned to his house. "I put the duplicate out of commission for a while. Now we've got some time. "

"I'll see what inventions I have with me," said Calvin, rummaging through his Hypercube and throwing the contents out on the floor. "Uuuhh…MTM, Mini Duplicator, Transmogrifier Gun,…that's about it."

"I think that if we take back the PEZ 6,000,000 first, we'll have an easier chance of taking down your duplicate," said Hobbes, deep in thought. "I suppose the Transmogrifier Gun could make your brainwaves stronger and get back the PEZ 6,000,000," suggested Hobbes.

"No good," replied Calvin. "The changes are only cosmetic, so it wouldn't have any effect. I've really got to fix that."

The trio thought more about their plan, when suddenly Calvin jumped up, grabbed his inventions, shoved them in the Hypercube, and ran for the front door. "C'mon, you two!" he called Socrates and Hobbes. "I've got a plan! Back to my house! We can't waste a second!"

They all bolted out the door and across the road.

"What's the plan?" asked Hobbes.

"Easy!" replied Calvin. "Remember how my duplicate said that his brainwaves are stronger than mine? We need to get to the Cerebral Enhance-O-Tron and increase my brain power! Then we can get back the PEZ 6,000,000! But we have to hurry before he gets back to the house!"

They blasted through the door, and stopped dead in their tracks.

Because a kid with yellow combed hair and a candy dispenser were waiting for them. But he didn't _just_ have the candy dispenser.

"You honestly thought I couldn't get back here quick enough?" asked Evil Calvin, standing in the doorway with the Transmogrifier Gun in his hand. "All I had to do was transform into a light particle and zip back here instantaneously. You're not getting through this door without getting through me first!"

Calvin threw a punch at the duplicate, but was transmogrified into a brick. But while the dupe was distracted, Hobbes and Socrates slashed Evil Calvin with their claws, grabbed 'Calvin' (the brick), and took off up the stairs.

Socrates turned behind him and saw to his horror that not only was the PEZ 6,000,000 following them, but a whole load of Calvin's toys that had been transmogrified into evil minions of the duplicate, with the sole purpose of destroying Calvin and Hobbes (and Socrates, if need be).

A toy airplane swooped by Hobbes and tried to bomb him, but Hobbes grabbed it and snapped off the wings.

A toy soldier tried attacking Socrates with a toy bayonet, but Socrates ran the soldier through with his own weapon.

"Where do we go!" panicked Socrates. "These things are everywhere!"

"Into the attic!" shouted Hobbes over the burst of fire from the PEZ 6,000,000, which was now on 'Handgun' mode. They leaped into the attic and sat on the door so that nothing could get in. But that didn't stop the Toy Army trying. They could feel the thump of them gradually breaking in.

"You hold them there a moment," said Hobbes, getting up.

He headed for a box buried in the corner of the room. He opened up the box and revealed a stack of old family photos.

CRACK! The Territorial Toy Army had just cracked a hole in the attic door. "This is no time to reminiscence over old family photos!" Socrates shouted. "They're nearly in!"

Hobbes rummaged through the box of photos and pulled out a microphone, covered with dust, which read the smeared, near illegible words:

Mega-Shrinker 5000

Created by Calvin the Bold, Boy of Destiny

Hobbes plugged the jack of the microphone into a plug and the neck extended.

"Socrates," Hobbes asked, with all seriousness. "Do you trust me to use one of Calvin's inventions?"

"Not really," Socrates replied. "But I suppose it's our only hope."

With a final SMASH, the Toy Army broke through the attic door, where they were promptly shrunk to a quarter of an inch tall.

Hobbes blew the top of the Mega-Shrinker 5000 as though it were smoke from a gun.

That was when Mr. Evil Duplicate came in.

"What is all the—"

ZZZZZZZEEEEEEEEeeeeeeepp!

Evil Calvin had too been shrunk.

But even in his tiny size, the duplicate got out his Transmogrifier Gun and shrunk Socrates to the same height as him.

"YAAHH! SOCRATES!" Hobbes shrieked. "I'll save ya, buddy!"

But he couldn't. The duplicate and Socrates were now the size of dust specks, rendering them invisible to the naked eye. And even though cats have superior eyesight, Hobbes still couldn't find the two. This should give you some idea of how small they are.

That didn't stop Hobbes trying, though. He was crawling on the floor, squinting as hard as he could to find Socrates.

"Well, well, it's just you and me now, kittycat," Evil Calvin smirked, as he pulled out his Transmogrifier Gun.

ZAP!

Socrates dodged the bolt, rebounded off a wall, and kicked the duplicate hard in the chest.

Meanwhile, Hobbes was desperately firing the Mega-Shrinker 5000 in an attempt to return Socrates to normal size.

While Hobbes was searching, Evil Calvin and Socrates were preparing to fight each other. _This_ isn't going to be pretty…

Hobbes mind suddenly snapped back to Calvin. Because Calvin's Hypercube was in his pocket, it got transmogrified into the brick also, so there was no way to get the second Transmogrifier Gun and get Calvin back.

Meaning Socrates would have to fight the dupe until the transmogrification on Calvin wore off. In other words, Socrates would have to fight the dupe until 24 hours have passed.


	6. War Breaks Out

_Chapter 6_

_War Breaks Out_

Both Evil Calvin and Socrates shot sharp looks of pure hatred at each other.

Finally, Socrates lost it.

"GAAAHH!" Socrates screamed, and slashed at Evil Calvin, ripping his shirt.

"Thanks to YOU, I don't have anyone to prank anymore!" Socrates bellowed.

The duplicate just laughed.

"Heh heh…that's just YOU, isn't it Socrates? The world's alright so long as you have someone to prank! WELL, LEARN A LESSON!"

Evil Calvin whipped out the PEZ 6,000,000.

Meanwhile, Hobbes was charging around the house, trying to find some means of getting Socrates back to normal size AND get Calvin back to normal.

"I'VE GOT IT!" Hobbes shrieked. He darted into Calvin's room, and rummaged through the closet.

Meanwhile, down in Shrink-O-Vision…

The battle between Socrates and the duplicate was in full force.

Socrates was entirely dependent on his claws, while Evil Calvin preferred to use his inventions.

The pair of them were very agile, and as a result, blows rarely connected. Almost every claw slash from Socrates was evaded by the dupe, and almost every blast from Evil Calvin's Transmogrifier Gun missed from Socrates' extreme agility.

"You're forgetting something, Socrates," the duplicate grinned, as he jumped out of the path of Socrates' arm. The dupe pointed behind him. There, with their weapons poised and ready, was the Territorial Toy Army.

"Alright, men, on my count." Evil Calvin shouted. "Three!"

The Toy Army loaded their rifles.

"Two!"

The Toy Army raised their rifles.

"One!"

The Toy Army aimed their rifles.

Socrates stood in shock.

His life flashed before his eyes.

But he did get a quick action replay of the time he hit Calvin upside the head with a slushball.

"Go on!" Socrates taunted. "Gimme all ya got!"

The duplicate growled in anger. "Goodbye, Socrates! **_FIR—AAUUGHH!_**"

Everything went dark. Nobody could see anything.

Suddenly, without any warning, there was an ear piercing, deafening ZZZZAAAAAAPPP noise. Then, almost as quickly as the darkness had come, it was light again.

The duplicate shook his head in disbelief. "What just happ—URGH!"

The duplicate was quickly grabbed and Normal Calvin repeatedly punched him over and over in the stomach.

Socrates looked around in wonder. "We're—back to normal size!" Socrates cried with joy.

"But how—" Socrates looked over at Hobbes, who was leaning by a cardboard box which had the word 'Transmogrifier' messily written on the side of it. Hobbes winked at Socrates.

"Take THIS, you good-for-nothing, low-down, filthy TRAITOR!" Calvin shouted. He was now rolling downstairs with the duplicate, as they both exchanged punches and unfriendly comments.

But Calvin, Hobbes and Socrates had all forgotten the main major threat. Socrates and Hobbes were just about to go help Calvin when there was a familiar sound.

**RATTATATTATATTATATTA**

Four ammunition clips were depleted in four seconds by the PEZ 6,000,000, which had just emerged from the Transmogrifier Box at full size. It's current setting was 'rapid-fire machine gun'. Socrates and Hobbes bolted downstairs.

Can I just say…if you thought that this story was nearly over…it's _barely_ even begun.

The PEZ 6,000,000 headed downstairs for Calvin.

Calvin and his dupe were now wrestling across the kitchen floor.

The PEZ 6,000,000 was now taking random potshots at Calvin. Every one missed. Suddenly, Hobbes and Socrates darted out the front door.

"Calvin! Lure Dr. Dupe outside! We've got a plan!"

"Gotcha!" Calvin said.

Calvin jumped off the floor and darted for the front lawn. As he did so, he shouted, "I'D BETTER USE MY NEW INVENTION!" This, obviously, lured the dupe outside, seeing as how he loves inventions so much.

The dupe ran outside.

And he NEVER, in a million years, would he have guessed what happened next.

**WHAM! CRUNCH! BANG! BINK! BONK! BOOM!**

Calvin was now standing in front of the duplicate, but he wasn't alone. He had an army with him. It consisted of five haired, red-and-black stripe clothed kids. Not to forget the two tigers in the front as well.

The dupe had just been pretty roughed up. Every member of the Calvin army had just charged him.

The duplicate simply laughed, in that sickening tone that made Calvin, Hobbes and Socrates want to re-tune his voicebox.

In one swift movement, the PEZ 6,000,000, that was flying overhead, dropped the Duplicator Box, which landed on the dupe, and the candy dispenser pressed the button with a gun turret, and Evil Calvin was transmogrified by 5, each one of them as twisted as the original.

Then, suddenly, war broke out.

Calvin transmogrified one of the Evil Calvins into a statue, Socrates and Hobbes took care of two with their claws also, while Calvin's army dealt with the remaining two. Calvins, both good and evil, were rolling around on the ground, fighting each other, shooting each other with Transmogrifier Gun lasers; some even passing out. Everyone had cuts and grazes.

Finally, the original Calvin snapped.

"**_STOP!_**" Calvin bellowed.

Everyone halted. Calvin continued. "I can't _bear_ watching everyone suffer like this! TROOP! RETREAT!"

"But Calvin, if we retreat, you won't stand a chance on your ow—"

"**_I SAID, RETREAT! This is between ME and my evil self! NO-ONE else has to get hurt!_**" Calvin screamed.

Calvin's troop followed their orders, and retreated.

"Oh, I see," sneered the original evil duplicate. "_Now_ who's a namby-pamby goody-goody? Men, attack! And **_DON'T_** hold back!"

All at once, all five of the duplicate's men leaped at Calvin.

Calvin and Hobbes leaped into the air.

One Evil Dupe tried to trip Calvin over; but Calvin got the advantage and transmogrified him into an ant, and stomped on him.

Hobbes knocked out three Evil Duplicates by pouncing on them and attacking them with his claws.

The last one was a coward, and ran back to the Original Evil Duplicate.

"What do you think you're doing; running away from battle?" The Original Evil Dupe shouted.

"They're too strong, and I'm hurt!" The duplicate said, clutching his grazed arm.

"Coward!" The Original Evil Dupe said. He punched the duplicate hard in face and kicked him while he was down.

"Owww!" The duplicate screamed. "PLEASE STOP!"

"**_COWARD!_**" The Original dupe repeated. He began kicking him harder. Then the original dupe got out the PEZ 6,000,000, set it to 'pistol' mode, and aimed at the duplicate sprawling on the floor.

"**_NO! PLEASE!_**" The duplicate begged.

Evil Calvin pulled the trigger.

_**BLAM!**_

Calvin looked at Evil Calvin. "You absolutely **_SICKEN_** me. You killed one of your own men because he was too hurt to fight. But the part that sickens me MOST…is knowing that in my present state; I can't do ANYTHING about it."

"Thanks for the compliment;" said the duplicate remorselessly. "If I were you; I would surrender yourself now. That way I can make your death quick and painless."

"Oh no," Calvin said. "Surrendering is the one thing I will never do.

Calvin turned around and shouted at Hobbes and Socrates, "RUN! NOW!"

Calvin, Hobbes and Socrates all ran over into Socrates house.

Well, not a house. It's a mansion. Which means that it's the perfect place for cover.

The trio ran upstairs.

Hobbes asked Calvin, "Why did you turn down the army we made? We could have beat him!"

"I'm pretty certain you're right, but I didn't want any more people getting hurt than there should be, otherwise, there's no real point in us even trying!" Calvin said, in a more noble tone than he usually uses.

Then he broke the tone and asked, "Hey, Crateso, where's the best place to hide in here?"

"Pretty much the whole house. This place is massive. Let's take my owner's parents' room. That ought to be good cover."

Hobbes nodded, and all three of them ran upstairs. But suddenly they heard a gunshot. The PEZ 6,000,000 had just blown the lock off the front door.

Calvin, Hobbes, and Socrates were all assigned to different points of the parents' room.

Calvin was dangling outside the window, and Hobbes and Socrates were hiding in closets facing each other, where the window was between.

"OK, everyone got the plan?" Calvin asked.

"Got it," the two tigers replied in unison.

WHAM! The door had been kicked open.

Calvin jumped out the window.

The duplicate chased after, but he tripped over a wire connecting the opposing closets.

That was when Hobbes and Socrates leaped out of the closets, pounced on the duplicate, and jumped out the window.

Once they were outside, the trio waited. Sure enough, Evil Calvin jumped out, but he immediately wished he hadn't.

Because Socrates had set up a firework outside, straight on course for Mr. Evil Dupe.

KRAK! **_BOOM!_**

Calvin, Hobbes and Socrates ran into town, knowing that that would provide great cover.

With the duplicate temporarily indisposed, the trio began to think up plans.

Plans to stop the duplicate.

Plans to stop the PEZ 6,000,000.


	7. Too Late

OK, things are starting to heat up. I'll estimate (I could be wrong) that there will be two, maybe three more Chapters left of this. I would like to thank everyone who has supported me so far. You guys rock!

Things will get a little confusing during the duplicate/duplicate soldier conversation, but try to make out of it what you can. Thanks!

* * *

Chapter 7

Too Late

Calvin, Hobbes, and Socrates were running as fast as possible. They looked up at a signpost. It said, "Town: 2 miles North."

Calvin fell to his knees. "We'll never make that long without supplies!" He moaned.

Hobbes dragged Calvin up to his feet. "C'mon, it's not like we can help it. I mean—"

Calvin cut Hobbes off, and shouted, "Hey! I know what we can do! I know who can help us! Follow me!" Calvin did an about turn and ran off. Without saying anything, Hobbes and Socrates followed.

"He's got another madcap scheme, hasn't he?" sighed Socrates.

"Unfortunately; yes." Hobbes replied.

Meanwhile, in the secret underground backyard base…

The duplicate was reloading the PEZ 6,000,000. He was holding it and pushing candy into the slot; but he was having trouble. The device kept on flying out of his hands and trying to escape.

"STAY STILL!" Shouted the dupe. He was very agitated about something. Finally, he stood up, and walked over to the wall. He began banging his head against it repeatedly.

BANG! WHAM! SMASH! BANG!

One of the duplicate's duplicate army walked in. He said, "Hey, sir, are you alright? Only I heard a lot of banging, and—oh."

The dupe was still smashing his head on the wall. He didn't even look up.

"What's the trouble, sir?" The soldier asked.

The dupe stopped banging his head, and said, very angrily, "If you must know, I'm trying to scrub my brain free of the memory of that boy…because I _AM_ him…and it makes me sick…"

"Sir?"

"Yes?"

"You do realise that, one day, no matter how long you try to suppress it, you're going to have to fight him…"

The dupe buried his face in his hands. "What are we going to do?"

"We can't," the soldier said.

"WE CAN!" The leader duplicate bellowed. "WE ARE GOING TO KILL THAT SCUM, AND I DON'T CARE WHAT IT INVOLVES DOING! **_HE IS PAYING!_" **The duplicate slammed his fist down on a table so hard it collapsed.

"Sir?"

"YES! What NOW?"

"You're dead meat. You know as well as I do that there is no way you can secure every possible means of him destroying you. One day, when you least expect it, those two WILL de—"

"**_SHUT UP!_**" The duplicate set the PEZ 6,000,000 to "Incinerate" and blew the soldier away.

Pure rage was building inside of him. Those words burned deep inside him…because he knew they were true.

"You know as well as I do that there is no way you can secure every possible means of him destroying you. One day, when you least expect it, those two WILL de—"

"—stroy you…" The duplicate finished. He walked over to a massive computer. The computer asked: "What would you like to know?"

"The whereabouts of Calvin and Hobbes, please," The dupe sighed.

The computer screen cut to a topographical view of town. It showed two tigers and a small boy running down the street opposite their house. The duplicate smiled.

"No. He was wrong. I've got him in my sights. That kid is putty in my hands now. If only you could see how wrong you were, soldier…heh heh heh…I'll kill them both soon…he's mine…"

Meanwhile; on that exact same street…

Calvin, Socrates, and Hobbes had stopped running. They were outside a house of moderate size. Huffing and puffing; Calvin wearily knocked on the door.

A voice came from the intercom on the door.

"Please state who you are; your business here; and the password."

Calvin did the talking. "I'm Calvin, and with me I have Hobbes and Socrates. We want your help to stop a sweetie dispenser from killing everyone. And the password is—"

"Sherman is Vermin," said Hobbes.

"SHUT UP!" screamed the voice over the intercom.

"Just let us in," asked Socrates.

The front door unlocked, and an eight year-old kid with messy brown hair answered the door.

The boy was a very good friend of Calvin and Hobbes. His name was Andy, and he had a very wise; yet sometimes outright annoying, talking hamster; Sherman.

Andy gets along well with Calvin and Hobbes.

Sherman gets along well with nobody; unless he's not being a smart aleck.

"Hey, Cal-man!" Andy greeted Calvin. "Hey, Hobbes! Hi Crateso! You guys look a bit tired? Want a drink? I've got some lemonade if you—"

"Thanks, but no," said Calvin. "We're here for help. Please…the world depends on it…"

Andy raised an eyebrow. "Again?"

"Yeah, but it's a new nutcase. One of my old duplicates hates me and is trying to kill me with my new invention. He's starting to get desperate. He's even killing his own army."

Andy slipped on a blue and black checkered jacket. "Let's go," he said. Andy scooped up Sherman in his hands.

"Hey, if you think I'M going as well; you're nuts! I—"

Andy stuffed Sherman in his pocket. He grabbed his rucksack, and the five of them ran into the direction of town.

* * *

"_Target Detected._"

"Who?"

"_Multiple Targets Detected. Analysis Complete. Identified as Calvin, Hobbes, Socrates, Andy, and Sherman. Recognized as enemies. Threat level 100._"

"Kill them."

"_Roger, Master. I will serve you to the best of my ability._"

* * *

Calvin and his friends were flying in the Time Machine. They were flying high above town. It was an incredible sight – the buildings that they weaved in and out of were so tall, it was amazing. People looked like ants.

Calvin looked over the side. He was miserable.

"There are people down there, doing what they always do. Working, walking, talking, the drill. I had the power to defend all of them, and now it's in the wrong hands; and now they're all going to die."

Calvin turned around and looked at his companions with a face of pure determination.

"Mark my words. I'm getting my invention back. And I need help. All in favour say AYE!"

"**_AYE!_**" The entire gang shouted.

Five minutes of flying passed. There was pure silence throughout the group.

"I'm hungry," said Hobbes.

"HUNGRY!" Calvin bellowed. "We're defending the planet AGAIN and you're going on about darned food! Forget it!"

Another five minutes of rather uncomfortable silence passed.

Again, Hobbes broke the ice.

"A MILLION BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, A MILLION BOTTLES OF BEER! IF—"

"OK, OK! BROWN'S GENERAL STORE IS COMING UP! **_ARE YOU HAPPY?_" **

The cardboard box dropped altitude; Andy, Sherman, and Socrates laughing the whole way. Once they were low enough, The gang hopped out; and Calvin stuffed the Time Machine into the Hypercube.

They walked towards Brown's General Store. But when they got there; the sight was horrible. The store's roof was smashed, and the door had a gunshot hole in it.

Inside was worse. Cabinets were broken, and shelves were crushed and reduced to sawdust. Hobbes was disgusted. Gummy worms were scattered across the floor.

"Hello? HELLO?" Calvin called, fearing the worst. "MR. BROWN?"

A man with brown hair, a brown beard and moustache, wearing a red and blue checkered shirt with a blue denim apron, rose up behind the counter. He had a black eye, and some nasty cuts up his arms. The gang ran over to him.

"Mr. Brown! Are you OK!" asked Calvin.

"Ow…yes…I'm fine…" Mr. Brown said. "I was behind there in case they came back…"

"It was him, wasn't it!" Calvin shouted, rage in his voice. "The kid who looked like me did this; didn't he! He had a gun, didn't he?"

"Yes," said Mr. Brown, looking shocked. "You know him?"

"We're looking for him," Socrates said. Hobbes looked at the gummy worms. He picked them up and threw them in the bin.

"Gummy worms, your sacrifice will not be in vain. I will avenge you!" Hobbes proclaimed. "That dupe is paying for this!"

"Is Martha OK?" Andy asked. Martha was Mr. Brown's wife; who also worked in the shop.

"Yeah," Mr. Brown replied, picking up shattered wood. "She was out when that kid attacked us."

Calvin reached into his Hypercube. He pulled out three walkie-talkies and handed one each to Andy, Sherman, and Socrates.

"Here's the plan," Calvin began. "I'm going after the duplicate to finish this; this has gone on for long enough. Socrates; you stay here and help Mr. Brown clear this up. Andy, Sherman, you investigate town and make sure everyone's all right. If there's trouble or there's something important; call me. Everyone got it?"

"Got it," everyone replied in unison.

"Great," said Calvin. "C'mon, Hobbes! We're takin' down a duplicate!"

"Oh, wow, fighting. Goody gum drops," he sarcastically commented.

And with that, Calvin and Hobbes left the shop.

* * *

Remember, Read and Review, please! 


	8. Andy And Sherman's Turn To Shine!

Chapter 8

Andy and Sherman's Turn To Shine!

"Wow." Andy said.

Town had been almost entirely wiped out. Houses were reduced to rubble. Buildings had been turned into what they originally had been – bricks and cement. There was a massive crack through the main roads. It went on for about a mile. Andy knelt down and took a look at it.

Sherman managed to wriggle out of the confines of Andy's pocket; and he too examined the damage.

Without looking at Sherman, Andy simply said, "Earthquake?"

"Impossble," Sherman scoffed; with that "Good Lord; how stupid can you fools be" look on his face that he often wore. "We would have felt the vibration back at our place."

"What WAS it caused by, then?" Andy asked; getting up.

Sherman jumped into Andy's rucksack; and came back out with a magnifying glass in his mouth. He placed it over the crack, and looked through the glass.

"It was caused by…unnatural causes…" Sherman concluded. "Take a look through the glass."

Andy knelt down again and peered through the glass. There appeared to be small pieces of silicon and electronic parts embedded in the tarmac.

Andy looked at Sherman.

Sherman looked at Andy.

They held their stare for a few good seconds.

"Duplicate," They both said in unison.

* * *

Calvin and Hobbes, however; weren't having much luck.

"This guy's a master of disguise!" Calvin panted. "There when you least need him, but never there when you want him!"

"Ditto," Hobbes replied.

"_That is because the creator is not that stupid._"

"Huh? What did you say?" asked Hobbes.

"What? I thought YOU said that." Calvin turned to face Hobbes; confused.

"_I said that. And I'll say this as well: I'll deal with you later. I've been told to make your death painful…nothing would be more painful for you than watching that other older kid and his hamster die…_"

Then, with no warning, there was amassive gust of wind; knocking Calvin and Hobbes off their feet. Hobbes managed to grab onto a streetlamp and cling on; but Calvin was sent reeling though town; down the street. He managed to stop at the end of the street.

The mini-tornado subsided; but the damage was done. One building had been halved; and trees had been separated from their roots. Cars were now nothing but mangled sheets of painted scrap metal. Hobbes ran up to where Calvin was.

"Are you OK?" asked Hobbes; picking Calvin up.

"Yeah, fine," Calvin replied. "But what _was_ that?"

"Beats me," Calvin replied. "But it did say it was going after Andy and Sherman."

"Meh, they can handle themselves." Hobbes replied.

"But they don't have any inventions!" Calvin replied.

"Precisely." Hobbes replied.

"Oh, whatever." Calvin growled. "Let's just destroy this dupe and go home." Calvin walked onwards.

* * *

Andy and Sherman had finally finished scanning town. Thankfully, no injured people were around.

Primarily because _they_ had all evacuated ages ago.

Andy picked up Sherman and said, "C'mon, let's go see Socrates and Mr. Brown. See if they're OK."

"You're getting smarter every day." Sherman commented.

"Meaning?" Andy inquired.

"That day I first met you I would've thought you were hopeless."

"Oh come on!" Andy shot back. "I wasn't _that_ bad!"

"Yeah, OK, whatever," Sherman admitted. "Now let—"

CRICK. CRACK. SNAP.

"What was tha—"

_**BOOOOOMMMMM!**_

A massive, huge, about 150 foot robot with twelve eye-lights the size of dinner plates and three tentacles rose out of the ground. It said in a massive, booming, robotic tone,

"What on—" Andy started, but he didn't finish.

"_Target detected. Recognized as Andy and Sherman. Launching annihilation procedure._"

"I take it that means he's not going to give us candy, then?" Sherman asked Andy.

"Don't get smart! That dupe must have made this!" Andy replied.

Suddenly, the three eyes started glowing shades of rainbow, and fired a bolt of laser at Andy. Andy barely jumped over it.

"Geez, this dupe has seen that _War Of The Worlds_ remake WAY too many times." Andy commented, wiping dust off his jeans. "How did they beat that thing?"

"Didn't the army kill the alien inside it, or something?" Sherman offered.

"Whatever," Andy replied, smacking his right fist into his left hand and clenching it. "I recommend we go on the offensive!"

"…and get killed," Sherman finished. "We have to assess the situation and think about this, Andy. …Andy?"

Andy was now running towards the tripod robot with a stick, screaming, "YAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" He whacked it in one of the legs.

This being a supreme robotic piece of machinery, you'd expect that to do absolutely nothing.

Do you know what?

It smashed off that leg entirely, forcing the rest of the robot to collapse in a heap.

"Alright! Go Andy!" cheered Sherman. "I'll work on cutting the wires inside it!" Sherman crawled into Andy's rucksack, came back out with a pair of pliers, came back out from the rucksack, and scurried up the robot, and disappeared.

"_You're pushing your luck, dimwits. Give up now and I'll make your deaths quick and painless._" Warned the robot voice.

"Sorry, I'll just not take death as an option at all," Andy replied. He walked up to the robot and kicked it in one of the eyes.

"_OW! Why you LITTLE—_"

"'_Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you,_" Andy started singing. He continued kicking it.

"**_AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH! THAT'S ENOUGH! YOU'VE PUSHED IT FAR ENOUGH!_**" the robot shouted.

A massive pipe suddenly rose from the center of the robot. It now looked like a flying saucer with a metal stick in the center.

"_Give up now._" The robot ordered. Inside the pipe was Sherman! "HELP!" He squeaked.

"SHERMAN!" Andy shouted. Andy ran towards the saucer, but it started paralyzing Sherman with electricity!

"_The further you come, the more the voltage increases! Don't take another step!_"

Andy stopped in his tracks. Then he said, simply, "Kill the rat. I always hated him."

"_W-what! What did you say?_" The robot stuttered.

Sherman couldn't believe it. Did Andy just say…he hated him? KILL him?

"I said," Andy repeated, walking towards the robot. "Kill the vermin. Turn up the voltage. DO IT!"

"_I refuse! I will never do what you say!_" the robot broke the pipe, and released Sherman.

"Buddy!" Andy cried, picking up Sherman.

SLAP!

Sherman hit Andy with his tail. "Why did you want me dead? WHAT DID I DO FOR THAT!" Sherman had tears in his eyes.

Then, Andy smiled at Sherman, and winked.

"Ah!" Sherman cheered up. "Now I get it! Good one, ol' pal! Let's hear it for…"

"REVERSE PSYCOLOGY!" The duo cheered.

The robot growled in anger.

"_You think you can destroy my creator? You're crazy! Do you really think you have a chance?_" the robot leered.

"To be honest, you've got nothing on us, you rusty piece of junk. Bring in on." Andy replied, taunting him with the 'come here' finger taunt.

The robot began firing lasers everywhere. Sherman dived into Andy's pocket, and Andy leaped from laser to laser, dodging them all. Finally, he got to one of the eyes, and—

_**SMASH!**_

Andy delivered a terrific kick to one of the eye-lights, smashing it in entirely. The glass shattered, and an electric current travel through the robot. This made the robot blind in two eyes.

"_That does it! Where are you? I demand to know!_" The robot screeched.

"Here!" Andy called.

CRUNCH! Andy threw a metal bumper from a broken car through the remaining eye, totally blinding it.

"_RAAAAAAGHHHH!_" The robot called out. "_You'll never take me!_"

The robot suddenly disconnected its legs, and began hovering in mid-air menacingly as a flying saucer.

"Why do I half-expect Rupert and Earl to suddenly come out of there?" Andy said.

"Because it's great equipment but they can't use it properly?" Sherman suggested.

"Yeah, that must be it," Andy said.

Then, without warning, the saucer deployed ANOTHER laser cannon, and began to charge it up. Lights from the saucer flashed as it built up energy.

"Huh boy, don't you have ANY other form of attack?" Sherman yawned. "You're so predictable."

"_SHUT UP!_" The robot retaliated. "_You are nothing before the awesome might of THIS attack! AHHAHA HAH HAH HAHHH HAAAAAAAH---_"

Clunk.

The laser cannon fell off, and landed to the ground; with Sherman on it, holding a screwdriver in one hand and some nuts and bolts in the other.

Sherman jumped off the cannon, and walked back over to Andy. "Dumb robot," He said, throwing the parts on the ground, scattering them.

"_Grrrrrr…DARN YOU! You've reduced me to my last resort!_" the saucer yelled.

The saucer then doubled in size; doubled again, and then tripled in size. It was now so big that its radius was big enough to crush town if it crash-landed into it. What are the chances of it doing that, though?

"_I'm going to crash-land into town and crush it MWA HA HAAAAAAAH!_"

Wow. Am I psychic or what?

Andy and Sherman could barely see a thing; the saucer's shadow was obscuring everything.

Not for long.

The saucer rose up into the air to gain height for the crash.

"I don't suppose he's going to use a parachute at the last minute and say "Psyche!", then?" Sherman asked.

Then, the saucer went into a nose-dive. It was speeding downwards at incredible speed!

"_Goodbye, insignificant insects! MWA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAA!_"

Suddenly, Sherman jumped off Andy's shoulder and raced for the cannon.

"I do a lot of jumping in this movie, don't I?" Sherman commented. He grabbed the cannon with his paws, and shouted, "ANDY! GET OVER HERE AND AIM THIS THING!"

"Roger!" Andy shouted. He picked up the cannon, aimed at the saucer, and Sherman was about to put his foot on the trigger—

WHAM!

The saucer extended an arm and knocked the cannon away!

"That was our only chance!" Andy cried. "It's all over!"

"Hey guys," a familiar voice called. A silhouette walked over. "Need a hand?"

The silhouette became clear, and picked up the cannon.

"SOCRATES!" Andy and Sherman called. "AIM IT AT TH—"

"Relax," Socrates replied. He aimed the cannon and clutched the button.

"Arrivederci, Deadwood."

KA—**_BOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!_**

As the saucer fell to pieces of scrap and debris, it asked Socrates a final question,

"_What in God's name are you? And your friends?_"

"You and your "creator's" worst nightmare," Socrates replied. "You're both dead!"

* * *

From a distance away, Calvin and Hobbes saw the brilliant flash of light as the robot exploded.

"Told ya they'd be OK," Hobbes said.

"Yeah…good on 'em." Calvin said. "Make a prediction, Hobbes."

"Huh? What for?" Hobbes asked, scratching his head.

"So I can see if you have ESP," Calvin replied.

"OK, ummm," Hobbes covered his eyes, put a finger in his mouth, and said, "OK. You will fight a duplicate of yourself in the near future."

"Yeah, we _know_ that," Calvin replied.

"I predict that you will…win?" Hobbes continued.

"I will? Cool! I _WILL_ win, anyway! Let's go, ol' buddy!" Calvin whooped.

"Oooh! Wait wait! I have another prediction!" Hobbes said. He covered his eyes again with one paw. "You will have an irresistible attraction to a cold, wet, muddy river," Hobbes said, smiling.

Calvin only then just turned around and realised – there was a cold, wet, muddy river behind him!

"Ha ha," Calvin said, sarcastically. "You stay away from me," He continued, backing away.

"It's going to come true! I can feel it!" Hobbes said, with weird goggly eyes. He was now walking towards Calvin, pushing him nearer to the river.

No matter how many pranks they played on each other, Calvin and Hobbes were always great friends.

* * *

Back in the back yard base…

"Computer!" The duplicate ordered. "Give me communication to Saucer-S123!"

"_Unable to communicate, master,_" the computer replied.

"What? WHY?" The dupe bellowed.

"_The status of Saucer-S123 is "Destroyed due to burnt internal components."_ The computer specified. "_It appears that…Andy, Sherman, and Socrates defeated it…_"

"WHAT? GRRRRRRR!" The dupe was now boiling like a kettle with anger. "Send out Tiger-R.O.B.-HL82, and destroy Socrates!"

"_Roger, master,_" The computer obeyed.


	9. Claw Gloves Are For Saps!

Chapter 9

Claw Gloves Are For Saps!

"So how are you guys?" Socrates asked. The three sat down.

"Oh, not bad," Andy said. "I have a graze up my left arm, and Sherman's hurt his back left leg from running too much, and you just saved our lives, but other than that, not too bad. You?"

"It's more or less customary to say, "I'm fine, thanks."" Socrates pointed out, with an undertone of a grin.

"Hey, I wasn't the one who asked in the first place," Andy laughed. "I'm _fine_. You worry about your own hide."

"Hey, we just destroyed a robot, Calvin and Hobbes will deal with the rest; and they'll have killed the dupe before he can send another monster after us. Righ—"

"_You're Socrates, aren't you?_" A robot replica of Socrates stood before him. It was absolutely identical to Socrates except it was entirely gray, and had gray and black stripes. He was a transmogrified Socrates; put in the Duplicator and Ethicated to Evil. He's a REAL tiger, just evil like the duplicate.

"Well, two-thirds right isn't bad," Socrates replied. "Socrates' the name, pranking's the game. If you want someone pranked, I'm afraid I'm all booked up on Calvin until Monday. What do you want?"

"_You dead,_" Tiger-R.O.B (the robot's name) replied. In the blink of an eye, the Tiger-R.O.B whipped out a glove with massive claws on the end of each finger, drew back his arm, and—

_**SLASSSSSSHHHHH!**_

Socrates keeled over. Blood poured down Socrates' chest from the five cuts he was given, but he miraculously stood back up, not even fazed.

"Freddy Krueger, Wolverine, or Captain Kuro…who inspired you?" Socrates asked. It was as if nothing had happened. He had just been slashed across the chest FIVE times, and he was carrying on a normal conversation with someone who wanted him dead?

What a guy.

Then again, he's not exactly one for giving up; is he?

"_You,_" Tiger-R.O.B. replied. He drew back his arm again to finish Socrates off.

_**SWISHHHHHHHHHH**_

Socrates had just blasted past the robot with his claws, causing a massive cut up Tiger-R.O.B's left arm.

"_You have good reactions and strong claws_," Tiger-R.O.B. complimented. "_That's why I based these claw gloves on your claws…but these are longer, stronger, and superior!_"

"Claw gloves…" Socrates said, thinking about it.

Tiger-R.O.B. knew Socrates was impressed with the gloves.

Of course, Socrates wasn't.

"…are for saps!" he finished.

Andy and Sherman, still sitting down; were watching this scene unfold.

Tiger-R.O.B. eye twitched with pure fury. "_Sap! Do you have any idea WHO I am!_"

"Don't know, don't care," Socrates replied, sharpening his claws by scratching them against each other. "You talk too much. Just bring it on."

Tiger-R.O.B.'s veins throbbed like a sore thumb. He was getting angrier by the second; a volcano ready to explode with rage.

"Hey," Andy called. "Are you all right with that wound, Socrates? Me and Sherman can handle it, if you like…"

"Eep!" Sherman squealed, and dived into Andy's pocket.

Socrates laughed. "Thanks for the offer, but...no offence, It'd be quicker for me to beat the snot out of him."

"Sure, go ahead, no offence taken," Andy replied.

Without any warning, Socrates suddenly darted towards Tiger-R.O.B, and started slashing at him.

**_SHING! SLASH! Ching! Clink! SHLASH! SWISH! SHLISH!_**

Socrates stopped. Not ONE of the swipes hit the tiger. He had his claws up defending.

_**SWISH**_

Socrates fell over again. Tiger-R.O.B. had slashed him again! Tiger-R.O.B. quickly took advantage of Socrates' predicament and kicked him hard in the wound.

"_AAAARRRRRRRGGHH!_" Socrates' cried.

"SOCRATES!" Andy and Sherman screamed. "ARE YOU OK!"

Socrates quickly jumped back to his feet. "Sure; fine," Socrates grunted. "Just gonna be a little longer than I thought."

Tiger-R.O.B. ran towards Socrates, ready to finish him off. "_Goodbye, Crateso!_"

Socrates head snapped upwards. His eyes filled with rage, and they pulsated with an eerie, brilliant red glow. His eyes matched the robot's.

"ONLY MY FRIENDS CALL ME THAT!" Socrates shouted.

Tiger-R.O.B.'s right-hand claws were perfectly positioned to stab Socrates, but Socrates grabbed his wrist just in time!

"YOU'RE NOT ONE OF 'EM!" Socrates twisted Tiger-R.O.B.'s arm around, picked him up, and smashed him on the ground!

_**CCRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUSSSSSSSHHHH!**_

"_AAAAAARRGGGHH!_"

"GO SOCRATES!" Andy and Sherman cheered, jumping up and down.

Suddenly, Tiger-R.O.B. got up, and was about to stab Socrates in the back; when Socrates instinctively ducked and tripped the robot up again!

Socrates wasn't letting up on the attacking, either. He immediately began kicking Tiger-R.O.B. in the chest, rolling him around the ground.

Socrates dragged his foot back for another kick; swung his foot, and, -- Huh!

Where did that robot just go? He disappeared!

"Hey," Socrates called over to Andy. "Where did he—"

Then, as suddenly as he disappeared, Tiger-R.O.B. was behind Andy!

"ANDY! BEHIND Y—" Socrates tried to shout.

But he needn't have bothered.

Andy did a quick roll on the ground, and the robot's claws missed.

Tiger-R.O.B. vanished again!

Socrates got tired of playing 'stab in the dark', and stuck his foot out.

"What are you doing?" Sherman asked.

TRIP! "OOF!"

Tiger-R.O.B. came out of thin air and tripped over Socrates' foot.

"Stopping a bad guy," Socrates' answered Sherman's question. Socrates pinned the robot to the ground with his foot, and said, "One last chance. Give up now, and never come back."

"_I…yield._" The robot slipped out from underneath Socrates foot. "_I admit…defeat._" He growled.

Tiger-R.O.B. got up, and walked away; into the distance. A newspaper sheet flew by, and town was back to its old self. Well, sort of.

Andy and Sherman stood up and dusted themselves off. "C'mon, we'd better find Calvin and Hobbes. Let's—"

"**_DIE!_**" Tiger-R.O.B. did his sudden re-appearing act again and was about to impale Socrates on his claws!

"How about no?" Socrates replied. "I DIDN'T WANT TO USE THIS! BUT YOU BROUGHT IT ON YOURSELF BY COMING BACK! **_TEN TIGER TEARUP ATTACK!_**" Socrates vanished!

Even Andy and Sherman looked astonished. "Ten Tiger…_Tearup_ Attack? What the heck is that!" Sherman wondered aloud.

Even Tiger-R.O.B. looked shocked. "_Where are you?_" He growled.

He soon knew.

_**SLASH!**_

"_UUUURRRRRRRRGGGHHHH!_" Tiger-R.O.B. collapsed. He had been stabbed…by claws.

_**SLISH SLASH RIIIIP!**_

"_AAAAAAAA! MERCY!_" Tiger-R.O.B. cried. He had three more slashes across him.

_**TEAAARRRRR RIIIP SLASH SLASH SLISSSSSSSSSH!**_

Tiger-R.O.B. was now barely breathing. He tried to get up and escape; but—

_**SLASH!**_

Tiger-R.O.B. fell to the ground, and Socrates reappeared next to him. "Here," He replied.

The robot wasn't moving.

"Is he…dead?" Andy asked in amazement.

"Should be, but let's not hang around to find out. Calvin and Hobbes need us. Let's go."

With that, the trio left town in direction of Calvin's house.

Back in the not-so-secret base…

"Status report, computer!" The duplicate demanded.

"_Tiger-R.O.B.'s Status – Deceased._" The computer replied; in that electronic voice that always sounds happy.

"Well that's just great," the dupe sighed. He got out of his chair, and said, "I'm gonna take care of things myself." He picked up the PEZ 6,000,000, and was about to leave the base; when—

CRUNCH! "OOF!"

WHUMP! "OW!"

Calvin and Hobbes landed in the base, and it didn't look like they were stopping by to sell cookies.

"Going somewhere?" Calvin asked the duplicate, with a grin on his face. "'Cos _we_ sure aren't!"


	10. The Final Battle!

Chapter 10

Calvin and Hobbes VS. The Duplicate Of Evil!

"I was about to come looking for you," The duplicate said. He raised the PEZ 6,000,000 to Calvin's face, and curled his finger around the trigger.

Calvin kicked the duplicate in the chest before he had a chance to fire. Hobbes quickly leaped on the duplicate and held him down. The duplicate struggled to get Hobbes off, but it was no good. Hobbes was too heavy.

Calvin quickly got out the Transmogrifier Gun, and took aim the duplicate.

"This has gone on for far too long! I-" Calvin shouted, but the dupe cut him off.

"Oh, Caaa-ll," he sang, and pointed above his head. The PEZ 6,000,000 was hovering there; and suddenly it changed its power dial to…

"_**Halley's Comet"!**_

"You…you wouldn't _dare_!" Calvin stuttered. "That comet is so powerful; it'd destroy the planet! It would kill _you_ too!"

"Heck, this is hardly the perfect planet, Calvin," the duplicate replied. "And I don't care, _because at least I can say, "I was the one who DESTROYED CALVIN AND HOBBES! MY GOAL IS ACCOMPLISHED!_"

The PEZ 6,000,000 made a 'click' sound, confirming the end of Planet Earth.

"**_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_**" Calvin screamed.

The three of them clambered out of the base, and looked up in the sky. There, coming slowly but surely, was mankind's worst nightmare – Halley's Comet! A massive boulder consisting of tons upon tons of rock, ice, and steel!

"**_HA HA HA AHA AHA HA HA HAAAAAAH!_** MY WORK HERE IS DONE! GOODBYE, CALVIN AND HOBBES!" The duplicate bellowed. He took out his Transmogrifier Gun, transmogrified a rock into the Time Machine, hopped in, and flew off towards the asteroid.

"Oh, yeah?" Calvin replied, getting out his own Transmogrifier Gun. "I can do that too!"

So he did. He shot a rock, turned it into a Time Machine, jumped in with Hobbes (with no reluctance this time, for some reason), and flew off toward the comet.

Flying at 100 MPH, Evil Calvin nearly reached the asteroid. He turned around to see Calvin and Hobbes slowly gaining on him.

"GIVE UP; YOU'LL LIVE LONGER!" The dupe shouted.

Calvin and Hobbes didn't listen though, and continued to chase. The dupe got out the PEZ 6,000,000 again, and started firing pot-shots at Calvin and Hobbes.

With his great experience of flying, Calvin whirled, twirled, and barrel rolled the Time Machine to avoid all the gunfire. The cardboard box did graceful flips, rolls, loop-the-loops, and—

"I'm going to be sick," Hobbes leaned over the side of the Time Machine, and he looked pale.

"OK, I'll stop," Calvin said. "He stopped firing at us a minute ago anyway."

The dupe was now right next to the asteroid; which was plummeting fast for Earth. He got out of the Time Machine and hopped on top of the asteroid.

He passed Calvin and Hobbes on the way, waving at them.

"I don't _think_ so!" Calvin said.

He jumped right off the side of the Time Machine!

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Hobbes screamed, from the Time Machine.

Calvin, freefalling through the air, replied, "SAVING THE WORLD!"

**_WHAM!_** He landed on the asteroid. He was lying down on his back.

The duplicate glared in anger. "You _never_ give up, do you?" He pointed his Transmogrifier Gun at Calvin's head. "You're in the way." Just as he was about to shoot, though, he heard nearby screaming.

"MAYDAY! MAYDAY!" the voice screamed. It was Hobbes in the Time Machine; falling towards the—

_**CRASH!**_

--asteroid.

Meanwhile, down on the Earth's surface; in Andy's house…

Socrates walked downstairs, into the living room, where Andy and Sherman were watching TV. Socrates had a big plaster across his chest. He sat down next to Andy.

"What's on?" He asked.

"The—" Andy was about to answer, but the screen suddenly changed from Spongebob Squarepants to the local news.

The reporter said, "A massive meteorite has been sighted heading for town. People are advised to pack only the essentials and get **_AS FAR AWAY AS POSSIBLE FOR GOD'S SAKE! AAAAAHHHHHHHH!_**" The reporter went crazy and ran out of the studio.

Andy, Sherman, and Socrates were unfazed. They all just said at once, "Calvin and Hobbes" in a dull voice, and continued watching Spongebob.

Back on the meteorite, the smoke from the wreckage of the Time Machine had only just cleared. When the view was clear, the duplicate looked at Calvin, but he had changed. He was wearing a colander on his head; which he had just Transmogrified from a pebble on the comet.

Then the duplicate looked back at Hobbes. Hobbes was holding a pen; and he had just finished scribbling "Cerebral Enhance-O-Tron" on the carboard box that used to be the Time Machine. Hobbes pushed the button on it, and there was flash of pure white light.

"Click." Hobbes said.

"Brzap." Calvin replied.

The bath of light subsided, revealing Calvin and Hobbes.

But…Calvin had changed.

His forehead was now MASSIVE.

"Oh, well done," the duplicate mocked. "Clever boy! He made himself look like an even BIGGER idiot! At least you can die with some humility! Goodbye!" He picked up the PEZ 6,000,000.

"You're gonna regret saying that!" Hobbes said, wagging his finger.

The duplicate replied with a "Whatever," and clutched the PEZ 6,000,000. He pulled the trigger.

Nothing happened.

He pulled the trigger again.

Nothing again.

He checked the ammo. There was still of plenty of candy in it. By this time, Calvin and Hobbes were snickering to themselves.

"Why are you laughing?" the duplicate snapped.

"Because," Calvin replied, "There is now nothing you can do to stop us!"

Suddenly, The PEZ 6,000,000 flew out of the duplicate's hands, and into Calvin's!

"The Cerebral-Enhance-O-Tron strengthened my brainwaves!" Calvin explained. He pointed the PEZ 6,000,000 at the duplicate, and got out his Transmogrifier Gun.

Calvin's brain assumed Tracer Bullet mode. "OK, bub, drop YOUR gun and put your hands where I can see them."

He dupe got out his Transmogrifier Gun, and JUST as he was about to put it down…HE FIRED A SHOT AT CALVIN!

A robotic voice suddenly said, "_Defense Mode Activated._"

The laser simply deflected off of Calvin.

"Nice try, buddy," Calvin said, "But I put the good ol' MTM on Automatic Mode. Kinda like an airbag."

Calvin shot the duplicate's Transmogrifier Gun with the PEZ 6,000,000, scattering it into tiny pieces of plastic; destroying the duplicate's only chance of coming back.

"Your turn," Calvin replied. Calvin grabbed Hobbes, and they jumped off the meteorite. As they fell, Calvin turned around, turned the power dial on the PEZ 6,000,000 to "Hiroshima Bomb," and aimed at the meteorite.

The duplicate's eyes widened in horror.

This was the end.

"**_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO—_**"

Hobbes waved, with a cheeky smile, at the duplicate.

"Peace out!" Calvin said. He pulled the trigger!

Click.

_**KA-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!**_

The sound was deafening, but the meteorite was still so high up the radius of the blast was nowhere near Earth. Small chunks of the meteorite fell to Earth, but they weren't big enough to cause any damage.

Calvin and Hobbes, though, were still falling. Calvin thought of a parachute on him, and aimed the Transmogrifier Gun at himself.

ZAP! He was wearing a parachute. He then turned to Hobbes, and aimed at him.

ZAP! Hobbes, too, now had a parachute. As they got close to the surface, they deployed the chutes.

"Well, Hobbes ol' buddy," Calvin said. "I'd say some new G.R.O.S.S medals are in order."

"Hear hear!" Hobbes cheered.

The duo landed on the ground, unscathed. Andy, Sherman, Socrates, and a whole slew of news reporters and journalists were waiting for them. They all pushed and fought to get to Calvin to ask him a question. The din was incredible. No-one could even hear themselves think.

Over the hubbub, one lady managed to get to Calvin and shoved a microphone in his face. It almost went up his nose! Hobbes giggled to himself.

The lady reporter asked, "What happened?"

Calvin simply looked at her, and said, "An ordinary day!"


End file.
